INDEPENDENT

0.13 … Alternate Reality

Dad ruffles my hair
and tells me that
he’s proud of me.
He reminds me to keep my feet
like Bilbo told Frodo
because we share a love
of literature and adventure.
His smile crinkles,
the footprints of crows
at his eyes edges from surviving
so many losses, yet still living.
He hugs me.
I’m so happy…

Mom chokes back tears
and gives me just the right
glimmering card that somehow
perfectly and elegantly articulates
how much she cares about me.
I wipe the tears from my eyes,
(I am this sentimental because of her)
and promise to call her every night
so she might vicariously live
every college experience
that she never got to have
through me.
She hugs me.
I’m so happy…

These alternate realities
I built for myself from
crumbled could have beens
and noxious never wills
are all I have.

My college years
were not marked with
their loving hugs
and cards
and literary encouragements.
My college years
were stained with
my desperate arms
and empty mailboxes
and perpetual disappointments.

I survived without them
somehow,
but the scars run too deep.
So to function,
these alternate realities
have become longed for treasures
that I keep.

⚬⧝⚬

For more from this collection, visit

elluminations, vol. 0
INDEPENDENT

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Cover Photo by Samuel Zeller on Unsplash  |   (elluminations © 2018 Elayna Mae Darcy)